I just called my friend Pastor Salen in Fiji. I wanted to tell him that I got ordained. He nearly shouted in joy. It was so wonderful to hear his voice again. He was standing by the ocean, looking at Voro Voro where the team went swimming once. I wish I could see it in more than my minds eye. I miss it there. I miss Labasa. I got an email from him a few days ago. Things are going well there. Mangoes are in season. I'm jealous.
Then I read up on the Millars in Fiji and how they are doing.
I feel so... jealous. and so alone at the same time. I wish I was there. I wish I could go.
The grant did not go through. Again. But we are going to reapply. Either way, on May 24th, I am leaving for FIJI. I try to pretend like it's not happening so I can live happily in each day... but I long for it. I dont' know why. I can't explain it. I try to play like I dont care... but I wish this season would end so that season could start. There is so much paper work this side. So much stress. So much busy. I'm so done. and I'm so jealous.
Wednesday, November 17, 2010
Thursday, November 11, 2010
the gate and the promise
I believe that God is ready to move, I believe He would say that "I am coming quickly, I am about to do a new thing, you cannot contain it."
Prophetic people desire understanding. We like to know about a move of God before the move happens. We enjoy being able to say "Praise the Lord!" and then add, "I knew that was going to happen"
I feel like what is happening now is that God's promise is coming, and the role of the prophet not to understand this one, but to warn the people of the gate. The gate is this word: "I am coming quickly, I am about to do a new thing, you cannot contain it." This is simply the gate to open the promise land of what God wants to do. I believe when we know about this gate and open our hearts to it, it will swing wide the gate itself, and the true promise will flow forth. First the correct position needs to be assumed. We need to be on our knees with arms open wide saying "whatever you want, Lord. We just want your presence!"
We need to be OK to not understand what is coming. We need to stop building structures for the the presence of God to dwell in. When Jesus died and tore the veil, God was saying "I don't want to live inside these four walls anymore!" We cannot contain what is coming. We cannot assume that it is our job to prepare something for this move of God to be accepted by the people, or to be fitting with our busy schedules, or to work on our terms of any sort. I would love to see us stop worshiping the structures of the church, and start worshiping the One who chose not to live in the four walls of any temple, but in the deep places of the hearts of man. When we come together, may it not be a pat on the back-"you can get through this next week"- time. May we assume the correct position. "Whatever you want Lord. We just want your presence!"
Prophetic people desire understanding. We like to know about a move of God before the move happens. We enjoy being able to say "Praise the Lord!" and then add, "I knew that was going to happen"
I feel like what is happening now is that God's promise is coming, and the role of the prophet not to understand this one, but to warn the people of the gate. The gate is this word: "I am coming quickly, I am about to do a new thing, you cannot contain it." This is simply the gate to open the promise land of what God wants to do. I believe when we know about this gate and open our hearts to it, it will swing wide the gate itself, and the true promise will flow forth. First the correct position needs to be assumed. We need to be on our knees with arms open wide saying "whatever you want, Lord. We just want your presence!"
We need to be OK to not understand what is coming. We need to stop building structures for the the presence of God to dwell in. When Jesus died and tore the veil, God was saying "I don't want to live inside these four walls anymore!" We cannot contain what is coming. We cannot assume that it is our job to prepare something for this move of God to be accepted by the people, or to be fitting with our busy schedules, or to work on our terms of any sort. I would love to see us stop worshiping the structures of the church, and start worshiping the One who chose not to live in the four walls of any temple, but in the deep places of the hearts of man. When we come together, may it not be a pat on the back-"you can get through this next week"- time. May we assume the correct position. "Whatever you want Lord. We just want your presence!"
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